Losing a friend: the truth you don't want to admit

The majority of us sadly at some point in our lives go through loss of a friend, if you haven't yet I count you as a very lucky person.

Sometimes it is simply just losing contact and growing apart which in some ways is a lot better and easier to cope with than the ways I've lost friends in the past. Arguments which spiral out of control also lead to this sad event. 

People cope with these situations in many different ways, some cry, some take it out on others, some block it out, and some get over it or may never even get over it. There's one thing I know for sure about loss of a friendship which I think the majority of people will agree with me about, and that is that it hurts so much to lose someone you told everything too and thought you were going to be those 2 people who everyone asks how they remained friends for so long. Then you realize you will be the person asking another couple of friends that question in years to come.

Personally I think losing a best friend is exactly the same as breaking up with a boyfriend or girlfriend because you are essentially losing a part of who you are. From personal experience it didn't come easy for me to accept that this was the reality that I chose to take and even though I knew it would eventually be better for me and everyone around me was telling me that I was better off and that the friendship was not a good one and that I was treated badly, I didn't see that till after it ended. I've taken a long time to accept that my friendship of 6 years with someone i considered my best friend during those years to be over and i'm finally able to speak about it with my loved ones without breaking down completely and wanting everything to go back to how they were no matter how horrible it seemed from the outside to people. 

No one ever likes change, especially if that change is one that changed you in the first place. Finding your feet, getting yourself together, accepting the situation is hard. You realize your real friends and family during those times of hardship.  Listening to a whole playlist of sad songs, deleting every single picture of you and your friend on Facebook, instagram, every tweet, every text, the number, Skype anything which would be too hard for you to see is deleted and every-time you delete something, you die a little inside. And people say they understand, but do they? No one ever truly understands you, but they try and that is what counts. 

My advice if anything is going through something like this currently, do whatever makes you feel better. Don't let anyone tell you that you should be over something if you are not. It's okay to be sad it's okay to want to turn back times but you need to learn to either accept the facts, or do something about the situation if you are not happy with what happened with you and your friend. If it's for the best then leave it, if there is a chance of becoming friends again then go for it reach for it and get your friend back. But always remember, you are your happiest when those around you are what is making you happy. If you are not happy and have grievances with that person. Leave it alone before it becomes a lot worse. Being happy is contagious, take your happiness and spread it like a wild fire to everyone around you. 

The joys of reading into another world

For me reading is something which relaxes me in times of stress and gives me the time to forget about reality and look into someones fantasy, a.k.a what the author has decided is the fate of the characters in the book.

I've always loved reading, my parents wanted me to get into it and pushed me into it very young because of how my older siblings seemed to have dismissed the idea of reading. Which sounds very weird to me that people don't like reading because, we all do it on some level every day whether its a text message or instructions on cooking a meal. We all read, so why not like reading something which is meant to be enjoyable?

The kind of books which I've always enjoyed are books which show romance and adventure and how in reality not everything is a fairy tale like we believe when we are children.

Reading to some extent has taught me how to be patient (although I am still a pretty impatient person at times) and not to rush things. Because when I was younger I would always read the last page of the book so that I knew what would happen and a lot of the time, that would ruin the suspense of a chapter which is explained on that last page. Now I know to wait and let the book run its course and that skill I now use in other aspects of my life like in my cooking or studying for exams etc.

Reading is something I cherish and I am so glad that I was born in a society where we are allowed to read, whatever social class, gender or ethnicity I am. I am so glad I can read books whenever I want and express my love for reading with freedom of speech on places like this blog.

I think in some ways reading is becoming less and less popular because many great books are being turned into films, so people would rather use less time and watch the films instead of reading the whole book which is where a lot of the time the true plot to the story lies. My own brother is such a big fan of the Lord of the Rings films and knows the films off by heart yet choose not to read the books because he doesn't like reading, which I personally think is really sad. Reading gives you an insight into someone else's mind who may not even be real but in your imagination is real while you are reading this book.

If there is one thing I've learnt from reading books, its that not everything stays the same once you change the page you're on. 

The one thing we all know yet never remember: Being a teenager is hard

Now i'm approaching the latter half of my teenage years I am starting to realize one or two things. Every living person becomes a teenager at some point in their life and as you get older many people laugh about their "teenage years" and try to push aside their mistakes which everyone makes when hormones take over our brains and put it into overdrive.

Yet everyone stereotypes teenagers to be this misbehaving annoying and angry group in our society that we should all be aware of. But everyone seems to forget that you were once part of this group in society and now you are an adult and condoning a minority and exaggerating it to the majority.

I remember a few occasions when I've popped out to the shops in a hoodie and jeans in the cold with my hood up and people have crossed the road to get away from me? I honest to god am the least harmful person you will come across on the planet, i get so upset if I've even accidentally hurt someone in any form. Yet those people crossed the road to get away from me?

Being a teenager is hard that is a fact, no one knows what they want and you think everyone is against you blah blah everyone's heard of the typical characteristics of puberty and teenagehood before its nothing new.

Yet why condone being a typical teenager? Everyone goes through it, every girl understands what a 11-14 year old girl is going through when she first gets her period and the hormones which make her cry over nothing. Every man understands the pressure of boys to look cool and get girls even if its not the kind of person they want to be.

I'm not saying to let every teenager get away with a tantrum which hurts peoples feelings or if they do something which is horrific and blame their hormones on it. I'm simply saying if you know a young girl or boy who is angry at you for something you haven't done or is changing who they are because of something or someone they know, don't be too harsh.

They are only human and one day (hopefully) the majority of them will become beautiful human beings who will one day maybe have their own teenagers to look after and deal with their tempers.